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Edo Special Jounin
Posts : 34
| Subject: Kurayami Clan Thu Dec 26, 2013 3:16 pm | |
| Clan: 暗闇~Kurayami Location: Makkuragakure Clan History:Kurayami Clan is an ancestor clan which has been secretly developed dark release since approximately 500 years ago. This clan was founded by a band of missing-nin from various country; making this clan dangerous and undercover. The development of this jutsu require more than a hundred people to die. Some because their chakra being absorbed, some because their blood has sucked dry and some because their body resistance against the experimental genes. Before the dark release able to spread, the band was brutally annihilated by the joint army of previous great villages. Almost every evidence about their exsistence was destroyed; leaving only few unknown whereabouts remains. At least 300 years after, the falling Makkuragakure trying to recover any source they can gather about this clan and their jutsu; In hope it can help them bringing back their golden age through military superiority. The Kurayami Recovery Project was leaded by a special jounin, Ou. By using the remaining sources and redevelopment process which cost more than a hundred people from Hanagakure to die, Ou and his team able to recover the dark release and using the name of Kurayami Clan once again to spread this jutsu within their village. Elements: Dark Specialization: / Kekkei Genkai: Dark Release (冥遁~Meiton) Kekkei Genkai Description:Dark release mainly focused on absorbing the enemy jutsu and return it back to the enemy. However, absorbing process and reversing the jutsu require different duration depending on rank comparison. Also, stronger jutsu can be neutralized but cannot be reversed. The newest development of this KKG also able to use the absorbed jutsu for amplify the original dark release techniques. Infusing the dark release into weapon through chakra flow will cause the enemy easier to fatigue and able to act as jutsu absorption medium instead of normally using bare hand method. To perform most of dark release techniques, a sign of two diamond; one overlap the other is needed to apply within the user palm. Drawbacks:Dark Release only able to absorb ninjutsu technique. Taijutsu and Genjutsu still applies normally; Stronger jutsu can be neutralized but cannot be reversed, even able to shatter the user hand in the process. The user with shattered hand wouldn't able to use any dark release technique until getting a new arm; All Dark Release Techniques except the jutsu absorption one, require using one third-party stored jutsu to perform; Only able to storing one jutsu at the same time. Kekkei Genkai Jutsu:- Dark Release - Inhaling Maw:
Name: Dark Release-Inhaling Maw (冥遁.吸穴孔~Meiton:Kyuuketsukou) Canon/Custom: CanonRank: D-S Type: Defensive Element: Dark Range: Touch || (0-30 meters) Specialty: / Duration: 1-5 post(s) Cooldown: 3 posts Description: Most fundamental technique for dark release user. In outline, this jutsu is able to absorb any kind of ninjutsu even the one that far stronger than the user capability. Thus, the absorption process is different regarding the rank comparison. The absorbed jutsu will be stored inside the dark release sigil and can be used for many purpose. To absorb a jutsu ONE Rank below or more; require 1 post duration process; the stored jutsu can be used anytime. To absorb a jutsu on the same rank; require 1 post duration process; the stored jutsu must be reversed immediately. To absorb a jutsu ONE Rank above; require 2 post duration process; the jutsu cannot be stored. To absorb a jutsu more than ONE Rank above; require 5 post duration process; the arm or weapon of the user will be shattered.
- Dark Release - Judgement:
Name: Dark Release-Judgement (冥遁.邪自滅斗~Meiton:Jajimento) Canon/Custom: CanonRank: C Type: Offensive Element: Dark Range: Touch || (Range of Original Jutsu) Specialty: Ninjutsu Duration: 1 post Cooldown: 3 posts Description: Another signature dark release technique. Like the other dark release technique, this jutsu need one stored jutsu within the sigil; This jutsu simply reversing the absorbed jutsu. The chakra used, the elements, the duration and any drawback from the reversal jutsu will applied as well.
- Dark Release - Punishment:
Name: Dark Release-Punishment (冥遁.邪自滅斗~Meiton:Panisshumento) Canon/Custom: Custom Rank: C Type: Supplementary Element: Dark Range: Meele Specialty: Ninjutsu Duration: Once weapon broken or deactivated Cooldown: Half the duration Description: Infusing the weapon with dark release technique through the use of chakra flow. The enemy that exposed or touched too long by the infused weapon will cause their energy being absorbed, making them easily fatigue. Touched, get slashed, or stabbed by the weapon in 15 posts to actually make the enemy unable to fight. But its main purpose usually to extends the user's range for Inhaling Maw or receive the rebound for absorbing stronger jutsu. (Stored Jutsu required)
Last edited by Edo on Thu Dec 26, 2013 11:13 pm; edited 2 times in total |
| | | Mizuko Jounin (S-Rank)
Posts : 211
| Subject: Re: Kurayami Clan Thu Dec 26, 2013 4:49 pm | |
| This is actually pretty damn well done for a first try, and for a release that a LOT of places just auto-ban out of habit and such. The only realy problems we have are in the jutsu. - Quote :
- Name: Dark Release-Inhaling Maw (冥遁.吸穴孔~Meiton:Kyuuketsukou)
Canon/Custom: Canon Rank: D Type: Defensive Element: Dark Range: Hand or weapon Reachable Specialty: / Duration: 1-5 post(s) Cooldown: / Description: Most fundamental technique for dark release user. In outline, this jutsu is able to absorb any kind of ninjutsu even the one that far stronger than the user capability. Thus, the absorption process is different regarding the rank comparison. The absorbed jutsu will be stored inside the dark release sigil and can be used for many purpose. To absorb a jutsu ONE Rank below or more; require 1 post duration process; the stored jutsu can be used anytime. To absorb a jutsu on the same rank; require 1 post duration process; the stored jutsu must be reversed immediately. To absorb a jutsu ONE Rank above; require 2 post duration process; the jutsu cannot be stored. To absorb a jutsu more than ONE Rank above; require 5 post duration process; the arm or weapon of the user will be shattered. This would need to be ranked differently. In this case; it would be D-S rank, since it would react differently to each ranked jutsu dependant on the rank of the user. This WILL require a cooldown. All jutsu require cooldowns. The range for this would be stated as such: Range: Touch || (Distance the returned jutsu can be fired) The range for all the jutsu will be formatted that way; this is one of the rare releases with dual ranges; Touch for the absorbption, and a stated distance for the fired jutsu. Judgement needs a cooldown; it doesn't have to be very high; but it will need one. At least 3 posts, please. - Quote :
- Name: Dark Release-Punishment (冥遁.邪自滅斗~Meiton:Panisshumento)
Canon/Custom: Custom Rank: C Type: Supplementary Element: Dark Range: / Specialty: Chakra Flow Duration: Once weapon broken or deactivated Cooldown: half the duration Description: Infusing the weapon with dark release technique through the use of chakra flow. The infused weapon will be weakened the enemies, making them quickly fatigue. But its main purpose usually to extends the user's range for Inhaling Maw or receive the rebound for absorbing stronger jutsu. (Stored Jutsu required) Alright, this would be Ninjutsu, not chakra flow. We don't use chakra flow here anymore, it was rolled back into ninjutsu for sheer simplicity's sake. The ranking is fine; the range would be Melee in this point, which is the range for any jutsu that is tied to the size of the weapon itself and not fired from it. "The infused weapon will be weakened the enemies, making them quickly fatigue." What? This is badly worded, and I'm not sure I'm understanding you correctly. |
| | | Edo Special Jounin
Posts : 34
| Subject: Re: Kurayami Clan Thu Dec 26, 2013 11:32 pm | |
| I've changed everything that you've mentioned. But, i'll make sure you really understand how the jutsu works. Inhaling maw only absorb and storing the jutsu, not returning it. I dont think applying the range is the right action; Returning the jutsu is judgement works, for that i've already applied the range as you said. - Changes Log:
- Rank of Inhaling Maw changed from D to D-S - Range of Inhaling Maw changed from Hand or Weapon reachable to Touch || (0-30 meters) - Cooldown of Inhaling Maw changed from / to 3 posts - Range of Judgement changed from Different to Touch || (Range of Original Jutsu) - Cooldown of Judgement changed from / to 3 posts - Range of Punishment changed from / to melee - Specialty of Punishment changed from Chakra Flow to ninjutsu - Clearing the Punishment attribute from "The infused weapon will be weakened the enemies, making them quickly fatigue." to "The enemy that exposed or touched too long by the infused weapon will cause their energy being absorbed, making them easily fatigue. Touched, get slashed, or stabbed by the weapon in 15 posts to actually make the enemy unable to fight."
Bump for Review ^^ |
| | | Mizuko Jounin (S-Rank)
Posts : 211
| Subject: Re: Kurayami Clan Thu Dec 26, 2013 11:52 pm | |
| Alright, I see where I messed up. Should have waited until a little later in the morning until I posted on this; I'm never the most coherent first thing in the morning; and I've been sick for the last 5 or so days. Was bound to make a random mistake somewhere. xD Alright, with the clarification of that one bit the jutsu makes a hell of a lot more sense. I'm actually glad what I'd quoted actually read what I had thought it had read and that wasn't just my brain going 'hurr durr' on me. I'll remove the unneeded range bit for you. Otherwise: |
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